W VS E

I'm convinced Westerners and Easterners write differently. I suppose it's the same with Northerners and Southerners, but living in Alberta, I'm caught up in the East and the West. This is a theme in my own work, and a huge topic in North American history (I'm not sure if it's more of an issue in Canada or if it's the same in the States).

At any rate, the people from West Canada certainly write differently than the people in East Canada. Westerners appear to be fans of short sentences and straight-forward facts. The Easterners love their long, flowing sentences with over-the-top metaphors. I'm convinced the thesaurus is their top tool, followed by a dictionary. I often wonder what causes the differences. Of course there are the exceptions. There are many exceptions, but I can't help but notice that novels written in, say, New York, are a lot more “elegant” than ones written in somewhere like Saskatoon. Does this have to do with the environment? The vernacular? The way Easterners and Westerners look at life? How we live our lives? Or is it just like saying a gigantic “screw you” to each side?

As for myself, I prefer to write simply. I find that my vocabulary and range of sentences are lacking in breadth and depth, but at the same time I try to write the moment. I'd rather have the reader engaged with the actions and characters rather than in awe of the elaborate vernacular and beautiful descriptions. Tell it as it is rather than confuse the hell out of everyone. Not that these wondrous sentences cannot be enjoyed and even admired. I am often jealous of these fantastic similes and personifications and descriptions and verbs, but sometimes they slow the story down to the point where I read entire paragraphs without absorbing any of the content. By the time I get to the end of the page, I couldn't tell you what happened, but I couldn't keep track of the numerous words that I was either impressed by, or had to consult a dictionary for.

I may be exaggerating a bit.

On the other hand, the simple, straight up approach can get painfully repetitive. I conducted an experiment in WMRR (my novel in progress) by bringing up the find feature in my word processor. I search for how many times I used the word “watch” and came up with 66 results within the first 100 pages. My largest offence was the last chapter where it turned up 10 times. This is mostly because I haven't edited it yet, but I shouldn't make excuses.

Some time when I don't have three research essays and a truck load of readings to do, I'd like to do a little reading and research of my own. I'm sure tons of work has been done on this topic. An inventory of styles would be interesting to make as well, just in my causal (or school) readings. My fiction writing professor stated that there was a certain Albertan vernacular that appears in writing that mimics the way we speak. Reading the lines, you can almost hear the words being spoken. I have to agree with this notion, encountering it many times myself.

Regardless, neither form appears to be inherently better, though many would argue for one side or the other. I like to look at it as a learning experience, where elements can be taken from both sides to make something entirely new. I've done more critical reading in these past two years than I have done in my entire life, and I think that shows in the progression of my reading and writing abilities. I see right through the mechanics now.

I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE.

And this is where the internet has broken me folks. Schwa out.

Shwout?

Wind Tunnels

The University has become an expert in such matters. I assume without meaning to. They have made at least 2 successful ones on campus, one in the path between Social Sciences and Administration and one now between the old library and the new Taylor Digital. Every time I walk in these areas the wind is blowing. And it's COLD. Seriously is this some sort of multi-million dollar experiment or is the university just bad at placing buildings?

Maybe I should ask the engineers with their shrinking hallways and doors that lead to no where.

Triple Corpse Hammerblow

Death metal is...pretty awful.

After much contemplation. I am pleased with my wedge of internet. Mmmm wedge.

ARGH WHY WON'T THE LINK WORK?

http://www.paranormal-encyclopedia.com/f/forer-effect/

Here you can have this one instead.

Also Blogger doesn't like LESS THAN 3.

Hey Now

Not cool bro:


http://openmedia.ca/meter

Also, I have left retail. I plan on not returning. At least...for a very long time. I am sad to say goodbye to my coworkers. Then again, they're just at the mall so it's not like I won't see them again. Meh. Anyone up for a Dance Party? I've scheduled one for WS on March 22.

Gatta get up to get down.

Retail Slave

My current job holding and title.

Though it's not so bad. I'm at the point where I work in enough areas of my store that I can do pretty much anything I want to keep myself busy. Cash, floor, filling, stock, running, processing, cleaning, cooking?, blowing up coffee machines...it's interesting. Then again, I've worked six months at my current job, which is long for retail. I have to admit I'm getting a little sick of it, especially due to recent events. I suppose it could have happened in any setting, but I'm a little turned off of the mall scene as of this past December.

I also realized that all my best stories come from work. I rarely have anything interesting happen to me in other settings. Even when I travel the events are...well uneventful. I mean the best travel story I have is when I was at a conference with a youth group in Germany two summers ago and we were told not to go anywhere in the conference centre (and the area around it) alone. Sound advice for anywhere you may be traveling (though I've known many to travel alone), but nonetheless and incident occurred, and we were forbidden to be alone. And then my entire team forgot about me. I mean, I don't blame them. I'm not all that vocal, and I AM kind of boring, but still, the group was only 12 people.

Anyway we had these groups ("family groups" I believe) where we met people from around the world and talked with them (which was...a little hard at times since not all of them spoke English or German). I had a rather hilarious encounter with a young Russian man who was trying to ask where I was from. I thought he was speaking to me in German, so I tried to reply in the few words I knew that I could only speak a little German. The guy looked at me as if I was insane, then asked more slowly, in English, where I was from. I had the classic blushing moment as I mumbled "Canada". He didn't talk to me again.

I had a similar experience at the McDonald's across the street from the centre, but I have digressed enough already.

After these family groups we head back to the main hall to eat lunch. I sat with my group and chatted with a German guy named Fabian. Fabian was an interesting fellow. I think he may have been one of the youth leaders, but he was close to my age at the time. I estimate 22. He made a lot of off-colour jokes, told me how Tylenol was not approved by the German health board (or whatever you call it there), bought me one of the more popular German drinks (which contained 2% alcohol...which really isn't a big deal unless you signed a contract before leaving saying that you wouldn't drink) and talked a lot about his wife, whom he had just married the year before. He also came back with me to the hotel the Canadians were staying in to get some of my Tylenol for his back (which is how the German health board topic came about). After that he called me his personal "drug dealer". I remember on the way back that day we were approached by two (Lutherans? Jehovah's Witnesses?) young people, a girl and a boy, asking us what languages we spoke. Fabian said speak English so we both could understand. They then began questioning us about our beliefs in God and Christianity, and whether we believed in predestination. Neither of us were too keen on being converted, so we debated a bit before returning to the conference centre. They continued to circle the centre asking people similar questions.

So after the lunch with Fabian, we split for the day and I went to go look for my youth group. I searched all over the centre hall for them where we said we'd meet to travel back together. We were supposed to head into Leipzig that day to enjoy being tourists. Leipzig was a fantastic city. We spilt off into groups that day of two or three people. I traveled with two people I had hardly known before the trip (and sadly hardly know now). At the time, however, I got to know them quite well. We shopped around the city, took pictures, visited Bach's old church where he began composing, ate tons of gelato (probably more than I ate in the entire month I was in Italy), looked for souvenirs to bring back to Canada, ate dinner in an Italian restaurant (seriously, the entire time we were in Germany, all we ate was Italian food...what the hell...), and finished the day by watching a show in Augustusplatz. The lights there lit up the fountain as the sky gradually darkened. The sun set behind a huge construction site with three giant cranes. I got some fantastic pictures of the cranes against a orange and pink sky.

Before we left, however, I spent thirty minutes wandering around the conference centre in the heat looking for my group. And when I say heat, I mean it was REALLY hot. The temperature outside was about thirty-two degrees if I remember, and it was hotter inside. Why? The building was made of glass. The building, was a giant greenhouse. The building itself was an architectural wonder. Honestly, the most boring building in Leipzig is ten times more interesting than the ones in Calgary. Calgary is...deprived in that area. More than deprived. Devastated is probably a better word. They had this beautiful spiral staircase in the one room that overlooked a shallow pool (about one foot deep). At first the pool was wide open and people dipped their feet in there. I think the pool was supposed to be more...decorative. That or people got a little out of hand. It only took the centre about four hours to rope it off and mark the side of the pool with German and English words, written in tape on the floor. The escalators were even interesting. The metal was painted red and white, so they looked like giant moving candy-canes. Or barber poles. My favourite picture is of be on one of those escalators.

I did get a better chance to look around while I was searching. I was more annoyed at the time, but I got to know the building well. A little too well. I remember most of its layout even two years later. I also remember their annoying system of numbering levels. Level 0 was always at ground level no matter what building you were in. The whole centre was partially on a hill. In some buildings the levels made sense, starting at 0 and moving up to 1 and 2 (1 being floor 2 in North America and 2 being 3 etc.). Then in other buildings, there would be floor -1 or -2, which was like the basement I suppose...only it wasn't underground.

Finally I made my way back to the main hall where lunch was being cleaned up. Still no sign of my team, so I decided to head back to the hotel and wait for them there. On my own. Alone. We weren't supposed to because of the attack on one of the girls at the conference, but I was fed up. I walked back past the kiosks and the "world centre" (with activities I never participated in...I'm lame like that) and headed out past the bus loop out front to the right of a large fountain where people were cooling off (by large I mean like Washington Monument pool large). There was a bridge in the centre with a monument in the centre. I can't remember if I went out to look at it. As I passed the bus loop, I saw one of the Canadian leaders there getting ready to head into Leipzig. I asked him if he had seen my team. He said they had already headed back to the hotel. Thirty minutes before.

I was, quite angry at first. My team had completely forgotten me at the centre. I started thinking it was hilarious about halfway back to the hotel. Our group leader had been so serious about not traveling alone, and they left without me. I wasn't upset. I was a big girl, 19 at the time, so really, it's not like I was a child with no idea where to go or what to do. The principle of the matter was what made me laugh. When I arrived at the hotel, my team was just leaving out the front door. Only half of them realized I was still missing. My team leader was apparently coming back to the centre to page me, but I found them first. HAH. Haha? They also didn't realize I was missing until they were back at the hotel. I guess I leave a STRONG, LASTING IMPRESSION on people. Like memory foam. On steroids.

I think I got a little sidetracked.

[GIRL]s in Gaming

I'm not entirely sure how much this topic has been covered overall, but judging by the lack of tolerance and the utter disbelief of the gentlemen that discover they have been playing video games with one of the female gender, I am guessing that the topic hasn't been touched on nearly enough.

A few days ago I walked to the train station with a friend from one of my history courses (in which the topic has nothing to do with this piece unfortunately) and we began discussing the lack of female representation in “Call of Duty: Black Ops”, a currently popular game (especially in the “teenage boy” demographic). She asked me if the game was worth buying, and more importantly if “girl avatars”, signs or other representation was present in the game. I said that after playing a great deal with my brother and exploring some aspects of the game, that there was not any overt examples of what she was looking for. Of course the option to customize avatars and call signs is a plus in the game, that is not enough for her. She wants blatant female representation in the forms of female characters, gender markers and avatars, which tell the multiplayer community exactly which gender they are playing with.

Now while the gaming community is a lot more accepting of female gamers, as I stated before, some are still shocked when they encounter them. When that gender is exposed, the person is treated differently, in either a more positive or negative manner. This is where the issue in and of itself lies. I believe that people shouldn't have to state their gender in order to assert the fact that both people play video games. Nine-five percent of the women I know play video games, even on a casual level. By casual I mean internet mini games, some games such as those on the Wii including “Wii Sports” or “Mario Party”, games on Facebook and the iPhone, and other similar sources. In other words, these games are the ones played waiting for a bus, or at a party or to waste time when one should be writing academic essays. Even my mother plays video games extensively and these games aren't limited to casual games. While she plays games such as “The Sims”, “Mario Party” and “Mario Kart”, she has also tried her hand at are “Oblivion”, the “Myst” series and all of the “Call of Duty” games we own. She is actually quite good at the games and actively asks our family if we would like to play a few rounds. She once asked me to play once saying something along the lines of “Why don't you take a break from you paper and come play some Call of Duty with us?”.

My point being, of course, that many women play video games and take up a significant portion of the gaming populace. They, however, do not get the representation that they deserve. Stereotypically, especially because of the norms constructed when video games were first created, men are the ones who play video games, have parties, talk strategy and compete. This stereotype bothers my aforementioned friend to the very depths of her being. As dramatic and over-the-top that sounds, I'm trying to discover whether that notion is worthy of such distaste. I agree that the stereotype should be broken down and overcome, but to what point and purpose?

I ask this because of the notion of being treated differently. Men and women will always be treated differently. No matter how one tries to promote “equality” between the genders, a fundamental, cultural belief in their differences will always exist. In terms of playing video games, this will most certainly always exist as well. One example that immediately comes to mind is one taken from the leviathan of a game, “World of Warcraft”, known in the gaming community as “World of Warcrack” (and let me just say I tried this game and got bored really fast...I don't experience its addictive powers I guess). In this game (if you haven't yet heard), you are given the choice of creating a character, which acts as a personal avatar designed to perform quests and other such tasks. In the creation, the player is given a choice of race, physical features, classes and, oh yes, gender. From stories that I have heard, and experience, the female avatars are often treated differently from the male (especially when the game first arrived on the market). I have heard they are given money, items, special status and experience different conversation than the male avatars receive. Is this because they believe that females are on the other end? Do they really think they're going to receive anything...special, because they treated them differently? Because they felt they had to? Many people in this game do not even chose the gender that they were born with. A lot of males chose female avatars just to get these benefits. In this way, the game portrays a sense of gender equality, but its players do not practice the concept.

One may argue that these issues are due to ignorance and inexperience of youth, but why would youth have these ideas in the first place? It's because the system of beliefs, values, and ideas they grew up relay this information. People are told that differences exist between the genders. People are told that females should be treated differently. Why should it be any different in the gaming community? Again turning back to a Call of Duty example, people are given the option to edit their own clan-tags, a four-letter combination of letters placed before the user name that associates the player with a specific place, group or individual trait. Often I see the tag [GIRL] in the pre-game lobby and I ask why that act is necessary. Do these “GIRL”s expect to be treated differently? Do they expect to enact a form of ridicule upon the other players because they were “beaten by a girl”? I find the notion completely ridiculous. If true gender equality and acceptance is what's desired, why do “GIRL”s work so hard to distinguish themselves as different. Sure this may anger the per-pubescent teenage boy because his world views have been shattered by a single round fired from the AA12 Shotgun of a “GIRL”, but in the long run, all that is being done is creating a class that separates the females from the males. No progress is being made.

Therefore, what I aim for is androgyny. A world where no one cares if the player is a female or male player, but instead focuses on the game itself and individual skill. I want a world where even if the players knew they had been bested by a female, they don't care because the issue derives from skill and expertise. Androgyny where the player is not thought of as “boy” or “girl” is an ideal the gaming community will probably not see. At least not in this lifetime. I myself try to practice this ideal, by acting androgynous in nature on the internet and within the gaming community. I am a female biologically. I participate and enjoy a lot of activities and endeavours that are “male” by tradition, stereotype and value. Because I even think of such activities and ideas as “male”, I am trapped by the same convictions that everyone else is. I will never be completely androgynous, because my base core, my sign and signifier, the way I associate with the objects and ideas around me have been set. The male and female established. Boundaries and barriers have been broken, but never completely torn down.

I have used this example before in other works (or rants I suppose) of mine. I post many videos on YouTube, such as walkthroughs, amusing incidents in games, and pieces of music. I have not identified with any gender in any of my videos and use text to relay my thoughts and opinions in the videos. I did, at one point, have videos voice-commentated, but have since removed the videos (I don't like the sound of my voice in recording). Those videos were the only aspect of my YouTube existence that identified me as female. Viewers of my other videos, however, perceive me as a male. In many times I get comments such as “dude nice videos”, “I like your videos sir” and “hey man, how do I fix this issue?”. The viewers automatically assume I am a man, but I am unsure of is whether this idea comes from the content of my videos (mostly walkthroughs of a video game called “Dungeon Keeper 2”), or if my existence on the internet is by default attributed to “male”. In other words, am I considered “male” because of what I do, or because cultural assumptions dictate that “male” is more common to find on the internet in such contexts?

Many would say that my failure to identify myself as female online is to blame (especially those who enjoy using “GIRL” in COD). In this mind-set, if females don't identify themselves as “girl” or “woman”, then nothing would exist to prove said existence of females online and in games (aside from a personal account...which can be denied and refuted). The players would assume that the person on the other side is a male (and I won't lie, I have often, by default, assumed this as well). As said before, this is because of the norms and stereotypes established throughout gaming history. So in order to break with these “traditions” (I'm using a lot of quotation marks aren't I?) wouldn't females have to establish themselves within the gaming community with blatant proof?

I answer with a “maybe sometimes in certain contexts”. Naturally, I would say no, because that's what I want to believe, but in some cases, especially those dominated by males, females have yet to make their mark. The gaming industry has come a long way over the years and whether that's for better or for worse...well let's just say that's another story completely. In terms of gender identification, females have for the most part made their mark and appearance, mostly in the last decade. Just today I was asked if I have played and finished “Assassin's Creed Brotherhood” and got an invite from a young man in which I don't know too well to play multiplayer with him. I have also recently been invited to “Halo” parties and “Mario” nights by some of my male friends to play. As an equal. I am, however, the exception. My friends are the exception. Please correct me if I'm wrong (please please time ten to the power of infinity...I want to be wrong here), but I don't believe a lot of females have the same experiences in gaming. So many are still underground. I grew up playing video games. From “Space Taxi” and “Spelunker” on the Commodore 64, “Mr. Do” and “Mouse Trap” on Colecovision, to my old PC games of “Warcraft 2”, “Diablo 1”, “Age of Empires 2” and my wonderful kid-friendly dinosaur and animal games, all the way to the games I play today, I have enjoyed and been influenced by these virtual adventures. I have always assumed that I had every right to play and talk about these games just as much as everyone else and for the most part, have gotten a positive response. I have never been bothered by those who think video games are best left for only 50% of the population.

In the end, my ideal world in gaming is one based on intellect, cunning, skill and practice, not one based on gender stereotypes. So please, my fellow female gamers, assert yourself by continuing to play, ignoring the insults made by intolerant minds, but don't feel the need to sell yourself as a GIRL. As for the men, tone down your insecurities and scorn concerning female gamers; they have every right to be there and participate. As much of a right as you. Let's be tolerant about this people. Gender means nothing. It does not quantify ability, capability or what is allowed or disallowed...it's just silly.

Yours truly,
Dr. Schwa

* This essay was for fun mostly and I did only a light, scanning edit. If something sounds weird or clunky, it's because I was lazy. I'm planning on going over it in the future in more detail.

** If anyone has questions or comments, please let me know by posting them here, on my YouTube account (either on my page or through PM), or though instant messengers, which I'm sure I have posted somewhere around here...

*** I am always open to discuss, debate, explain and listen to stories about experience or points that I have missed. I am also planning on writing more on similar topics in the future, so if you read this, feedback is much appreciated!

**** HAH I only used one exclamation point in this document and it wasn't even for the core document. TAKE THAT FICTION WRITING! Oh sheeeeet I used two. What you guys ganna do about it? Just kidding, I love you all.

Bah

Don't you just hate people who fart in academia's general direction and receive A's? I'm not one of those people. I'm the person that farts in their general direction to get the B's. I'm too lazy to waft enough to get the A.

Man that was a disgusting analogy.